Not a Sport

Well, it's time for the Olympics or, as they like to be called, the Games of the Modern Olympiad (or some fluffed up BS) which means it's time to see medals awarded for Basketball, Rugby, Swimming, Track & Field and a host of other, actual, sports.

It also means that diving, gymnastics and other non-sports get lumped into this mess and get medals.

Wait, what????

But OF COURSE gymnastics is a sport you say.

"No, it's most certainly not." is my reply.

While the athleticism and sheer incredible that we see on TV each night during the diving, gymnastics and other judged events is impressive. (I could not walk down a balance beam without wobbling much less do what those ladies do, and if I tried to perform a vault I would turn my spine to sawdust) that doesn't mean that we're talking about "sports" here.

The fact is, if your primary form of scoring is subjective judging, and not an objective target (a basket, a run, a touchdown, a try, etc.) then you're not a sport. I'm sorry, but it's true. Judged-scoring events are not true sport, because there is no objective form of winning. 

All that being said, we HAVE to call them something right?  With that in mind here is my humble suggestion for categorizing these events in order to lead to a more peaceful, perfect sports universe.

Sport (n). An athletic contest whose primary form of points scoring is an objective target. Examples: American Football, Football, Basketball, Archery, Table Tennis, Badminton, golf, track & field, swimming. etc.

Athletic Competition (n) An athletic contest whose primary form of points scoring is subjective. Examples: Gymnastics, Diving, Ice Skating, Figure Skating, Competitive Dancing. etc.

Competition (n) A non-athletic contest whose primary form of scoring is objective. Examples: Poker, Chess, etc.

Pageant (n) A non-athletic contest whose primary form of scoring is subjective. Examples: Miss America, Dog Shows, etc.

I had to include dog shows and Miss America style pageants because I have actually heard their announcers say "in our sport" without a hint of irony.  There is no "sport" of beauty pageants. I'm sorry folks, there is just not.

All of the above said, I do realize that these categories are imperfect and likely to cause some debate. Look at tennis this morning. Certainly a sport, but it is still judged. And quite often, as was the case with Coco Gauff, those judges frequently get it wrong. Whether out of bias or incompetence or just simple human error, they can eff it up with the best of us. However, their input is usually not enough to turn the tide. The goal in Tennis is to make more shots and win more points, sets etc. than your opponent. if you do this, you win.  Period, end of story. Even in football there is the occasional bad call, and while instant replay has gone a long way to fixing this issue, it's still not perfect.  But in any sport you need rules, and those rules have to be officiated.

In all the main difference between "Sport" and "Athletic Competition" is how points are awarded. Objective is sport, subjective is not.

Last night I was watching the Olympics and I heard in both gymnastics and diving "well, the general public is not going to understand how these scores were awarded". I'm sorry, if you have to say that you're not a sport. EVERYONE knows when a basket is made, when a home run is hit, or when a touchdown, try etc. is scored.

It's no wonder then that subjective judging is among the worst judging in the world. If no one knows how it's calculated, then how can you argue if the judges are right or wrong? In objective sports you pretty much can know what the rules are that the officials are judging on. That's why bad NFL/College football calls are so glaring, it's why people think Gauff got the shaft today. In subjective judging, there's really no way to tell. Much of the judging is based on reputation, what the judges think the athletes can do, not what they actually accomplish.

So, for our sports sanity we need to break these things down into categories. Otherwise we're living in the sports equivalent of anarchy, and no-one, except for the Chinese athletes, wants that.